Nainai 2

Children,

Nainai is unwell. Her lungs are not functioning properly now. She appears quite normal after a long period of rest. Her mind is strong and she smiles and speaks cheerfully. After one or two hours of normal activities she becomes very tired as the oxygen level in her body gets depleted. She will walk a few steps and then need to sit down gasping for breath.
Her left arm is swollen and the movement is impeded. The legs are also swollen.


Nainai's body is unwell but her mind radiates equanimity. She says that this body of ours will fall sick and grow old. The body is not us, for if it is us then we can tell the body to stop falling sick and stop growing old. It is more important to practice for a strong mind.
It hurts us knowing about Nainai's condition but we can help her manage the situation. Let's leave the caring of her body to the medical professionals. We can all play an important part helping Nainai maintain a strong mind. You can cheer her up by recounting the happy moments you had with her. Like how she used to care for you when you were little, the holiday trips that we did together and the way she used to pamper you. Tell her about some of your interesting daily activities.
Sending a get well card is another good idea; her address is 02-09, Pangsapuri Melur, Jalan Melur, Bagan Jermal, 12300 Butterworth, Penang.

The chanting sessions we did was good. The scene of many members of the family chanting was joyful and dignified. All seated around Nainai, palms together and chanting the Guan Yin Phu Sar, Om Mani Padme Om and Or Me Duo Fuo. Everyone had a chance to hold Nainai's hands. It brings the family together and everybody, young and old alike, can do something for Nainai. We should do it regularly.

Grieving is a process, it starts with denial, anger, bargaining, depression and at last acceptance.
Denial: it cannot be me.
Anger: angry that so and so is not doing enough. I must have done something wrong. Who's fault?
Bargaining: make this not happen and in return I will...
Depression: extreme sadness, the mind keeps repeating the misery and losing interest in other things in life.
Acceptance: once one accepts the eventuality one can then get on with life.
Investigate which part of the grieving process you are in and take care of the health of your mind. Working as a volunteer, I have come across cases where people stayed in the depression state for a long time. It is both not healthy and not beneficial.

We hope Nainai will recover but let's prepare for the worst. If you need to say something to Nainai, say it now. If you need to do something for Nainai, do it now. For tomorrow may be too late. We do not want to carry the burden of guilt for the rest of our life regretting not doing what is right.
Every phase of our life ends, the end of one phase is the beginning of another phase, a better phase. Make the best of the phase you are in, be good be happy, for it will end sooner that you think. Face the new phase with courage and confidence; it is the foundation of a better phase.
Life is a journey. In this journey of ours, difficulties are bound to have but misery is a choice.



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